it's probably been a while since i've updated this, and school's almost over.

editing has been going well, and i think things will turn out pretty good overall. there are still some parts that i wish we could have gotten better, mainly i think Matt's performance toward the end could have been a little more crazy... also i think we could have gotten a little crazier with the camera work towards the end, but all in all it's ending up pretty nice. plus, Paul and I may try to artificially crazy things up with the editing.

the editing process has been pretty easy. almost too easy, since i think Paul and I are on the same page with everything. as far as the rough cut goes, there were only a handful of shots i wanted switched around, and for the most part he put it together how i think it should have been. so yeah, basically it's just tightening things up, which i will let him do himself, since hopefully he has a better sense of that as an editor than i might.

so that's that.

i'm still trying to find an internship. i did the Ron Shumpert presents TV show, which was okay, but not really what i want to do. hopefully i can hold out until i find something that's an actual narrative film of some sort to intern on.

the ron Shumpert thing did lead to meeting this dude Kevin who seems like he does a lot of videography type stuff, and that led to getting paid $20 the other day to record some stand up comedians at a bar. that was fun, and i guess now i can say i'm a professional?

and... other than that, just working on a screenplay.

things will be cool, but it's kind of scary to be almost done with school, actually. i also now have to figure out the rest of my life, which is weird.

wrapped filming up last night at around midnight. it was pretty good, despite standing around in the cold and the wet, it was fun. it makes a huge difference when the director you're working with is in a good mood, since this shot of hours in the wet cold, was way way easier than sunday's hours in the wet cold.

i messed up on the scheduling again though. not that it was entirely my fault, but with my experience this summer, i really really should have argued for not trying to cram almost everything into one 16 hour day. seriously. i attempted a little bit to try and convince people to move some shots around, but i really should have stuck to my guns more about that, because i think the film suffered because of it.

i know personally i wasn't able to get quite a bit of the shots i wanted to get, and i left the lighting not entirely the way i wanted, plus i forgot a few things that i wanted to have the actors try. it wasn't a huge disaster, and the scene will work and make sense, and i think we also got some good performances.... but. it could have been much better, and 1) if i wasn't pressed for time so much. i generally work pretty quickly, but still, it would have been best if i had gone first and wasn't crunched 2) i wish my mood was better.

i was originally gonna start right away in the morning, was excited for that, but my D.P. overslept (he had been on another 12 hour shoot until 6am before that), so we decided Brad should shoot his scene first. he didn't get rolling until about 11am. eventually at that point, i realized i wasn't going to make it to work at all, so i had to call in. i probably should have lied and said i was sick, but i didn't, i told the truth that i was on a film shoot and it was going longer than expected, and ended up getting a really bitchy response from my boss on the phone, the sort of response designed to make you feel like a shitty person (not so much what he said, but tone of voice.) so, i was kind of stressed about that. plus, spending hours waiting for Brad to get done, and not really being able to do anything myself, except for just continually cut shots that wouldn't be able to be gotten. i don't mind being somewhere for hours if i'm occupied, but i really hate the sitting around not doing anything.

then.... there was also some tension within the group on the set. which, makes it hard. it wasn't horrible, but there was definitely some unpleasentness. i got really frustrated personally when i was attempting to A.D. it was hour 15th hour or so, it was cold and wet, and the entire crew was complaining. i told the director this, and tried to say "hey, we need to hurry up or reschedule otherwise the crew is probably going to revolt" and just got the reply "i don't care! i had to wait around for 2 hours! i'm refusing to cut any of my shots!"

yeah. eventually he listened. and eventually, i heard a few quiet assides from his D.P. such as "i don't really care how it looks, i'm tired and wanna go home" not exactly, but that was the gist of it. some things were cut, but it was unpleasant.

so.... scheduling. NEVER DO THAT AGAIN.

second.... try to maintain a much better mood. i think i'm a good enough actor where nobody noticed when i was upset, but still... i felt it, and i gotta work on not letting shit get to me on set. i'm getting better at relaxing overall (i've noticed this since quitting smoking, weirdly) but i need to not let myself freak out as much mentally when things don't go right. it happens, you gotta roll with it, and understand that it'll never be exactly how you want it, but it'll still be good.

the actors, however, were pretty amazing. Dennis was great at keeping up morale, especially by starting to sing "The Safety Dance" during rehersal, and just generally being fun to be around. Stephan was able to just jump into the role right away, and didn't require much direction once we established his character. Also, he was awesome at helping me with Mo, who was not a proffessional or experienced actor at all. Mo was having trouble getting the emotion of being about to be shot, and so Stephan helped me working with him and rehearsing and gave him a bunch of advice. it was great and really appreciated, and i think it made Mo a lot more comfortable and he gave a stronger performance because of it. Nate is also a pretty fun guy to be around. he was getting pretty loopy and weird by the end of the day, but we just ran like 6 or so takes of his shots, and by the end he was back into character and did pretty good. he was also a good sport though, and when we finished, offered to stay around and help load equipment.

so, overall, it was hard, but good. i also really like the whole bonding experience you get in a film shoot. there are a few people i don't want to work with again, but overall, i think  almost everyone on the crew and everything were a lot of fun to work with, and are pretty good people too.

i just spent the last 3 hours this morning being super productive. producing wise that is. as much as i am not a fan of the overall producing element, i kind of enjoyed making some lists. printing some documents, and also doing the breakdown sheet on the script. maybe i could be a good production assistant?

after talking with Andre, i have to completely re-do my shot list. he convinced me of some stuff, which definitely is opposite of the initial vision i had. however, he had some good ideas. and... perhaps, my original conception of a series of just really long takes isn't the best. perhaps i'll try that some other time.... but, the idea of bringing a little more humanity to Doyle's character is a good one, and i totally see his point of trying to get the audience to relate to this guy who is about to get shot, rather than having it simply be Jimmy's viewing of the situation. i watched Boogie Nights last night, and i forgot how i like Paul Thomas Anderson's style in that movie. those long moving shots are insane, and i think that'd be fun to try some time. but, not for this maybe.

i also re-watched Miller's Crossing. god that is so good. i might try and watch it again before the shoot next weekend, since i think it's quite relevant to what we're doing, Irish mob and all. a handsome film about men with hats.

do any of the characters wear hats? i don't think so, unfortunately.

the room we have is really small, which worries me. it'll take a lot to get shit out of there, but we can do it.

anyway, i'm still not sure i'm feeling creative enough to do another shot list. i distracted myself, and was productive enough to get some producing business taken care of, but... still not in a good enough mood to do another shot list. there is a vast difference between the logistical film work and the creative film work. it's really hard to try and force the creative stuff.

*

spent yesterday morning working on a shot list of sorts. at least, i've got the basics down of what i want to do. one of our actors is going to school for Media Production, and about to get certified in CGI. he's playing the dude who gets shot, so, the question is: do we have him CGI a super gory computer generated special effect of his head exploding from the gun shot?

i think not, unfortunately, because i really think that would completely take away from the general theme and mood of the rest of the project. however, on the other hand, it would be kind of fun. still, it's good, for later, to meet someone who is into that sort of thing and maybe has a talent for it.  he also is very in favor at least of lying in a pool of blood, so i feel that's good.

anyway, after having my shot list, i feel pretty confident and ready to go shoot. i even did some very crappy very basic storyboards. i know mostly we're supposed to stay away from storyboards, but i still like to have them, sort of as a bit of a safety net. i've storyboarded every other project i've done, and the way it seems to work is like taking notes in a class. i rarely look over my notes after i write them down, but the act of writing it down helps me remember what i want to remember. so, i probably am not going to look at my storyboards, but just the act of drawing them helps me remember what i've visualized in my head. also, the shot list is very short. only 6 shots, and i know at least two of them aren't even necessary, but are more "this would be cool if we have time."

lately i feel myself being drawn more to longer takes, and also, being efficient. like, how can i convey what i want to convey with as few shots or camera angles as possible? maybe it's not efficient, i dunno. i'm not sure how to explain exactly what i'm thinking here, but it makes sense to me, and that's the most important part.

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in other, related news, i've been stressing about my student loan/financial aid situation lately. the office says i should be getting my loans for this semester soon. apparently though, i also owe money to the U of M still. which sucks, because i thought i had that all paid off. it was kind of a kick in the teeth to see this debt just show up out of nowhere (seriously, it's been like 4 years since i've seen a bill from the Dept of Education, but it's been there the whole time, growing fat and bloated with interest.)

so, i'll finish schooling with like a total of $40,000 in debt. that's a lot of money to end up with an Associates Degree at the end of the day.

but, if i don't take out more money, i wont be able to afford to keep up the modest lifestyle to which i've grown accustomed. i'd probably have to get a full time job to support myself. but, if i do that, i wont' have enough time to concentrate on school... so, despite the fact that my current part time job sucks and they're weirdly dicks about getting time off, that 20 hours a week is a good balance of work and still being able to do what i need to do for school.

and, i still need time for a little bit of a social life. it's a few hours here and there, but having friends outside of school and work keeps me sane.  it's worth it to spend $15 to get some beers with friends at the bar every now and then.

i am getting sick of being poor. even with a part time job and loans, i'm just swimming barely above the poverty line. there's been quite a few things i would like to do or like to own that i can't afford. (like a car for example). or trips i would like to go on, but i can't afford to take the time off work.

i lost my train of thought here, but i think the point is that i'm actually more motivated to be successful now.

*(turning this into a journal about my crazy movie making experiences, to be turned in at the end of the semester, i guess?)*

i think the biggest problem with this whole project seems thus far to be coordinating a bunch of schedules. we were going location scouting tonight, and i was kind of hoping that we would be on that already, but instead things got all mixed up with the cinematographers and coordination, and now we aren't going until later.

which leaves me with time sitting at home, not really able or wanting to start on anything since i don't want to miss my ride to location scouting, but also feeling pretty bored. however, it's probably good that i came home to eat instead of spending money on eating out.

i think we have some good leads on locations, i'm a little nervous about the bar not looking quite right, but it'll be okay and i'm sure i'll be able to work with it.

the dude we wanted for one of the parts finally got back to me and he's totally into it and free on the day we'll need him, so that's cool.

it's definitely a lot of fun when things start coming together on a film shoot. i know i get a little buzz off of it and always end up feeling pretty good when all the pieces fall into place. we'll see. i guess you could say that i'm cautiously optimistic.

i start shooting tomorrow night! and it'll be fun. i think. i hope. kind of the moment of truth to see if it'll get done.

i kinda have some shit to do before shooting tomorrow, but i got the entire day off (!) so, i'm gonna put it off until then.

wanna know why i'm gonna put it off until tomorrow?

'cause i splurged and got myself a copy of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let_The_Right_One_In">Let The Right One In</a> by John Ajvide Lindqvist and also The Big Rewind by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nathan_Rabin">Nathan Rabin</a>.

i'm slightly excited to start reading them.

the last few days, that is, Sunday through today, i've been getting up way later than i really want to. also, i've been feeling really groggy and kinda blah for some reason.

it's rough, because, i have a lot to get done. i still need to test out how the fuck i'm gonna get a clean recording of people's voices in my van. (the van is noisy as fuck. and... where am i gonna put the microphones?)

hopefully i'll be able to find people to help me with this either tonight or tomorrow. then... go to school on Thursday to copy it all over to my hard drive and review it...

maybe tomorrow i'll see if my parents can help?

lately though, as in, the last few days, i've been playing a lot of Mass Effect. it's super goddamn fun, and i would suggest it to anyone looking for a good RPG. basically, pretty much the same as the Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic games... except much better graphics, and not based on Star Wars.

gonna go location scouting on Thursday, driving to Luck, WI with Kelly. that should be fun.

i had a dream last night where i was dating a Mexican girl. it was pretty sexy. then for some reason we went up and hung out on a space station.

i also came up with an idea for a tattoo. i'm not going to tell anyone what it is, because if i do, i'm sure someone will make a "that's lame" face, and talk me out of getting it.

that's all. not that interesting, but a good excuse to waste time. i've been thinking, actually of starting a real blog somewhere, like wordpress or something, and just comment on various news and cultural things.

last night i had a dream that i was rounded up in a concentration camp type thing with a bunch of people that i know and didn't know. we were all crammed in some weird cement structure of some sort, with lots of barbed wire and whatnot. it kinda looked like the place had been bombed out or something. it may have actually been a demolished shopping mall.

i was brought into some kind of holding cell or something surrounded by armed guards.

after sitting there for a while, not really sure what was happening, a guard came up to me and told me it was my turn to be executed in front of a firing squad.

i walked out with him, then thought for a second, and then ran back into the holding cell. i went up to someone who i know (names removed to protect the innocent) and gave her a big long kiss and told her i loved her.

the guard pushed me away, then they drug me out to the yard area where i was going to be shot. i got lined up in front of the firing squad. they got ready, lifted their guns up and were about to shoot...

then the ground started shaking and the building started falling apart. i guess the concentration camp/mall was getting bombed.

i ran back to the holding cell to find the girl i had just expressed my feelings to. she was okay, as were most of the prisoners (the guards were mostly dead).

it was kind of awkward. i was like "uh, sorry about earlier..." and she just replied "oh, it was no problem. you were about to die, it happens." understanding, but still awkward. i think we were still friends after that.

fast forward to a few years later, and all of a sudden i was hanging out in this big mansion out in the middle of the woods. it was me, this older guy and some rich woman and her daughter. we found out somehow that we were being attacked. then, me and the older guy revealed that we were both ninjas.

we had to dig through our laundry to find our ninja uniforms. i was pretty upset because i couldn't find my ninja belt. for some reason this belt was important. eventually i found the belt in some big pile of underwear.

the old guy stayed in the house to protect the rich woman and her daughter. i went outside to the woods in the back for some reason.

in the back yard, i ran into a young Kim Jung Il. he was just hanging out there in the back yard for no reason. i explained we were under attack, and led him out into the woods where i thought it would be safe. for some reason i talked like Christian Bale in the batman movies.

i had to sneak around and disarm all these traps. there were also a bunch of feral little people (that is, people with dwarfism) who wore brown hoods that lived in the woods. i couldn't tell if they were friendly or not, but i figured Kim Jung Il would be safe with them.

then i woke up.

dreaming about escaping the firing squad and being a ninja is pretty awesome. i wish i could have slept all day and had that line of dream continue, because it was pretty fucking awesome.